Injecting 2021 nostalgia into your veins
The biggest Goon-Fest on the Ethereum blockchain.
10,000 GOONERS are crawling out of the basement for a public mint built to bring stupid, funny, unhinged 2021 NFT energy back.
For the Fucking Culture
Mint
10,000 GOONERS with right-hand fatigue on the Ethereum blockchain.
233 different traits.
43,106,484,384 total possible combinations (43.1 BILLION for you stat dorks).
25 unhinged 1/1s that will make you laugh your dick off.
Making NFTs Fun Again
What Are Gooners?
They are about to be your favorite PFP collection, that's what they are!
10,000 GOONERS have been caught red handed on the Ethereum blockchain, just wrecking their meat to AI girls, OnlyFans demons, and guys in Pakistan larping as CT hot girls.
These basement dwelling no-sun-seeing, no-grass-touching, no-girl-getting gooners are printing millions in magic internet money, yet their life remains sad.
It's up to you to break them free, give their right hand a rest, and show them that there is more to life than gooning over mid 6's who are really Pakistan chatters. Actually, it's pretty gay.
These GOONERS are determined to make NFTs stupid, insane, and fun again.
Remember those days?
If you do, then you are in luck, because we are bringing back the 2021 vibes.
Questions from the basement
FAQ
Warning: Triggered pussies should skip this...
A 10K PFP NFT collection now? In 2026? Are you fucking insane?
We sure are. Somebody had to bring back 2021 NFT vibes! They aren't going to ever come back if people just stand around with their thumb in their ass. When NFTs were fun, it snowballed into creativity and ideas throughout crypto. Stop overthinking and time warp back to 2021 with us.
How many GOONERS can be minted during the public sale?
No limit, you big dick swingin baller. When the public mint opens, connect your wallet and mint like it's 2021 again.
Are there any rare 1/1?
Yep, there sure are. 25 of 'em! Unhinged and funny as fuck.
What is the "uTiLiTy" of GOONERS?
GOONERS were created to make you laugh and inject a little 2021 NFT nostalgia into your veins. It's that simple. No speculation. None of the shit that caused NFTs to stop being fun.
Will there be a token?
No. Never. Name one that worked out. We will wait. Seriously, only a mouth-breather would think a token is a good idea.
Is there a Discord or Telegram?
No and no. The only communication channel is X. So, click here to follow GOONERS on X.
Does my GOONER come with commercial rights?
You can do whatever you want with your GOONER, big guy. Commercial rights were one of the biggest nonsense nothing-burgers to come out of 2021. Crypto culture thrives when it's vibes, humor and pure insanity. If you want to launch a line of GOONER cum rags, go for it you little entrepreneur.
So, it's just art, vibes, and nonsense?
Yes. Si. Oui. Exactly how it should be!
So, what happens after?
GOONERS will live on the Ethereum blockchain forever. That's the after. GOONERS are forever! The fun was sucked out of NFTs because of insufferable losers never being satisfied, and always demanding more. Any normal person with a brain knows that isn't feasible. What happens after you go see a movie? Does the ticket stub keep making shit appear out of thin air? What about after a round of golf? Does the course keep giving you shit? No, of course not. But, God forbid one of those losers went outside and tried to do something mildly athletic, they would leave the golf course crying that the course "extracted" because they didn't airdrop them something. Seriously, the industry went to shit because it let losers with ZERO concept of the real world have a platform. Fuck 'em! The sooner NFTs are treated like entertainment and an experience, the sooner they will return to 2021 levels in terms of being fun. What about after you buy a Chipotle burrito bowl? You take a huge shit. Unlike that Chipotle burrito bowl, GOONERS won't rip your asshole in two pushing out a huge log after the fact. In fact, you are left with a digital collectible piece of art. Pretty cool, huh?
What about [**insert annoying fucking question**]?
Listen, these are just funny NFTs created to make you laugh and bring back a little of the 2021-era vibes. Don't take it too seriously. If you are a self-proclaimed "invesssstttoooorrr" go play in the S&P 500. If you miss the fun of NFTs, and want the days of vibes, fun and crazy art back, mint GOONERS.
Your "Stuck In Goon Mode" Song Slaps. Full Album Soon?
Fortunately for blink-182, Sum 41, New Found Glory, Good Charlotte, and Simple Plan, we are declaring our punk rock career a one-hit wonder. One banger, and done. It's better than 99% of the music out there today, isn't it? Not only are we bringing back 2021 NFT vibes, but we are also bringing back pop punk.
Don't even ask
Roadmap
Fuck off...
No Rest for Your Right Hand
MEAT MASSACRE
So addictive that you might have to learn to switch hands...